“Stress Management.” I can’t emphasize the importance of this enough. As an SRNA or as a significant other of an SRNA, you must find healthy and realistic ways to manage and minimize your stress!
Not only has stress management been crucial to my overall health, but it has also affected my role as a supporting spouse, significant other, and/or parent.
NEWS FLASH: Your SRNA is NOT the same person he/she was before they started the program! (That person packed their bags and went on a 2 year vacation.... ) By this, I mean their emotions are on a very very crazy roller coaster. Things that used to make them smile and laugh may now make them sad and cry. CRAZY!
My advice would be to learn their NEW signals of what not to do or when not to do it. This will make life so much smoother for everyone during this program. Seriously, I felt like I was on a steep learning curve when it came to my wife’s new crazier-than-ever emotional state. This person I thought I knew was no longer there, and I often pushed the wrong “buttons” at first (still do at times...). So in the mean time....while trying to figure my wife out (if that is possible...*Cough*), I realized very quickly that I needed some ways to deal with her backlash, without throwing it back at her.
Not only has stress management been crucial to my overall health, but it has also affected my role as a supporting spouse, significant other, and/or parent.
NEWS FLASH: Your SRNA is NOT the same person he/she was before they started the program! (That person packed their bags and went on a 2 year vacation.... ) By this, I mean their emotions are on a very very crazy roller coaster. Things that used to make them smile and laugh may now make them sad and cry. CRAZY!
My advice would be to learn their NEW signals of what not to do or when not to do it. This will make life so much smoother for everyone during this program. Seriously, I felt like I was on a steep learning curve when it came to my wife’s new crazier-than-ever emotional state. This person I thought I knew was no longer there, and I often pushed the wrong “buttons” at first (still do at times...). So in the mean time....while trying to figure my wife out (if that is possible...*Cough*), I realized very quickly that I needed some ways to deal with her backlash, without throwing it back at her.
These are things that I DON'T DO (but might think about):
What ACTUALLY helps:
Get creative and have fun doing it! It's a great way to release some built-up stress. 2. I have started to Draw again (it's been YEARS!) This one is fun and gets my mind on a positive. It also stimulates a little brain activity. Drawing pictures for the "fam" puts smiles on their faces AND give me gratitude in my work = STRESS RELIEF! 3. Eat healthy Again, healthy lifestyle and also good, positive energy. 4. Walk the dog We BOTH get fresh air and exercise. 5. Play video games Not the "healthiest" choice, but it's a great way to check out of reality every once in a while. 6. Listen to music and SING (loudly) Who said I had to be a good singer... 7. Write poetry Judging someone is UNhealthy...so don't judge...LOL!! |
Finding ways to conquer my stress has not only been healthier for my mind and body, but has also helped me be the loving and supportive husband that I want to be. Now if I happen to trigger one of those things that sets her off....I smile, immediately and honestly apologize (not just yell SORRY!!), tell her I understand what she is going through (even though I have no idea!!.....only those in the program know), walk away, and let everything simmer down.....This has actually helped!
Remembering the last good time we had together always helps too... (Nothin' like the "good ole' days!!)
So if the PREVIOUS ways you've managed and dealt with stress are no longer sufficient for life with an SRNA, try something new! You never know...
Remembering the last good time we had together always helps too... (Nothin' like the "good ole' days!!)
So if the PREVIOUS ways you've managed and dealt with stress are no longer sufficient for life with an SRNA, try something new! You never know...